{"product_id":"sidewalk-shepherd-shirt","title":"Sidewalk Shepherd shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eremember that show Whale Wars?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"Delivery bot, this is Sidewalk Shepherd. You are illegally operating a motor vehicle in a protected area. Stop your operations. We will not allow you to continue.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYO: If you suspect that you might find yourself in a kinetic self-defense situation with a delivery bot, DO NOT WEAR THIS SHIRT! Vandalism is a felony in Pennsylvania if you do $5,000 or more in damage. Even if your face is obscured, the cameras will see the shirt and they'll subpoena Shopify for a list of customers who bought it, and then they'll charge your ass.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e100% cotton black shirt with white. Hanes or Gildan brand tees depending on availability. Printed to order and shipped out of West Philadelphia by me, Mattie.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"ToxicFemme666","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":57077793718438,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":57077793751206,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":57077793783974,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":57077793816742,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XXL","offer_id":57077793849510,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":57077793882278,"sku":null,"price":26.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL","offer_id":57077793915046,"sku":null,"price":26.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL","offer_id":57077793947814,"sku":null,"price":26.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0525\/8280\/9766\/files\/sidewalk_shepherd_front.jpg?v=1787161456","url":"https:\/\/toxicfemme.net\/products\/sidewalk-shepherd-shirt","provider":"Toxic Femme","version":"1.0","type":"link"}